Last week I got pulled over. On account of not having my proper tags on my car. It’d been two entire weeks since the new license place had been thrown haphazardly into my trunk. And since stashing Christmas shopping packages a few days prior, I’d forgotten completely about it.
I, had, of course asked my dad to do it. Not because I didn’t know how or couldn’t. It was just cold and I didn’t want to. Then forgot. The task slipped Dad, AKA Wonk’s mind too, and there the tag sat.
Any word on when the Winchester brothers are getting an updated tag style? You KNOW they can’t get pulled over.
Until I got pulled over. By the nicest cop in the whole entire world. He was real gentle about it, didn’t use his sirens and introduced himself all nice. Not like in a grandpa way on account of him not being old enough to be my grandpa, but more like an uncle or my friend’s dad type of way.
Then I explained how I didn’t have a screwdriver. Which isn’t true but was also the first thing out of my mouth. And once I said it I couldn’t unsay it. I’m obviously not smart enough to not lie to a cop, but I am definitely smart enough to not tell them when I’m lying. He might’ve given me a ticket for fibbing, or dishonesty behind the wheel, which sounds like it should be a thing.
Next he asked for my driver’s license and did some radioing about my name and new license plate. Then once it checked out he did the nicest thing ever. HE PUT ON MY NEW TAGS. Right there on the side of the road. Explained the difference between standard and Phillips heads – which I half knew, but half didn’t know – and whipped out one of those pocket turn-into-any-type-of-tool things, and got to work.
Tightened up my screws and bid me good day with a, “There now you’re legal.”
Other things that happened at some point:
- The cop’s handcuffs were purple, on account of him being a campus cop, which I wanted to ask about but was also too nervous to bring up. I’d like to know if they’re for sale; they’d make an excellent gag gift for any K-State grad.
- A man also bought me lunch that day, like 15 minutes before said pulling over. Solid day for sexism and I’m pretty ok with it.
- I did, however, have to pay my entire library fine of $.20 on account of there being no male librarians; I gave them a $.05 donation and they were way too excited about it.
- The cop updated my local address from the one it was previously listed as, the semi-country house, from where I called about stray dogs attacking my chickens.
Thanks for the positive experience with the law, officer. You made my whole Monday. J