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I Have an Announcement, and it is That I Have a New Boyfriend
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , ,
I Have an Announcement, and it is That I Have a New Boyfriend

It’s true. It’s been true – for not super long, but not super short. And now I’m ready to tell you about it. So read up or don’t, just don’t ask me in person like you didn’t get this very convenient announcement. Cause, much like burgers with cheese, I won’t be having it.

First things first, I know everyone is just dying to know his nickname. And I’ve decided on – drumroll please – Bo. On account of several reasons. Because he’s Southern and there was a Duke cousin named Bo. Also because he loves shooting things, with bullets and with arrows. And most obviously, because he’s my beau. Except that I hate the 90s French spelling,* even if he does speak a fair amount of French.

FAQs

How’d we meet? Fate/irony.

What does he do? Professional badass/traveler. You decide what that means; it’s not bounty hunting.

Which part of the South is he from? The part right by the water.

Do I “really” like him? Duh.

Will I write about him? It’s happening. Right now.

Plus other invasive questions that will be explained in even less detail than above.

Things that I’ve Done with New Boyfriend:

  • Scratched (and won off of) multiple lottery tickets.
  • Carried bullets in my purse … on three separate occasions. That’s what purses are for, right? Bullet organization devices.
  • Eaten at Chic-fil-A.
  • Been inside a Wal-Mart, for the first time since Beer Olympics. And saw Collin Klein.
  • Had a lot of conversations starring grits.
  • Worn an Alabama shirt … and drank from an Alabama coozie. (Not huggy.)
  • Been threatened with the “deliciousness” that is sweet tea. Pssshhhh
  • Stored ammo in my craft bin.
  • And other things.

There you have it. A full-fledged, blog style press release.

Additional comments can be directed toward my publicist. He/she is waiting for your call.

 

*As in VH1’s best series ever, I Love the 90s, Part Deux.

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