In a controversial move for a tea-based blog, today’s post will be about coffee. Or rather, coffee accessories. It’s nothing personal to my homeslice, tea, it’s just a nice change of pace to smell coffee (when it is 6 am) and feel caffeine affects that actually work. Also works as a cheat for dessert. Pour in some of these delicious creamers and you can trick yourself into thinking you’re actually getting dessert.
But I’d like to offer some suggestions, coffee creamer makers. Flavors that can (and should) be made to enhance our fake sugar meals. Also, to the grocery stores, if you could go ahead and stock every single one of these, year-round, that’d be great. No skimping to make room for the same generic crap; everyone is over French vanilla. Especially when it’s fat-free. (Can I get a collective bleh?) Instead, you should be making and stocking (depending on your position in coffee industry) all of these delicious tasting goodies. Better yet, let’s make it a creamer bar. Where I can purchase different blends by the ounce. And to be green about it, let’s invent a reusable pourer with built-in separators too. Up to six flavors, one reusable container … that comes with a discounted product for use, obviously.
If I can buy 15 types of olives at one time, why not multiple coffee enhancers, too?
It’s cherries and it’s chocolate, and sometimes, it’s swirled into a cheesecake. So to cover all our bases, there should be a black forest regular and a black forest cheesecake. Sure it’s named after a region, not ingredients, but as the good people of Germany dubbed their beloved cake, we’re here to pass on its glory – expanding it across the sugary universe!
Salted Caramel Pretzel
If you think coffee couldn’t use some salt, you’re wrong. Not only is this idea quirky, it sounds damn delicious. Companies can pair it with a coupon for some actual caramel salted pretzels to boost sales. You’re welcome.
Banana Cream Filling
Yes, just yes. Get in all of our bellies.
Apple Cinnamon Spice
Seriously. There’s apple cinnamon everything else throughout the fall, why hasn’t it made itself into creamer form? It’s just waiting for someone to liquefy it and make it even more delicious.
Krispy Kreme Donuts
Who needs an actual donut when your (lower calorie) morning beverage tastes just like it? Or, go ahead and keep pairing the two; dual temperature-d breakfast. This also seems like a good opportunity to expand into the AM pastry market, with flavors like blueberry pancakes, Belgian waffle with extra powered sugar, and for the adventurous, maple-cured bacon.
Rocky Road Brownies
It’s got chocolate, it’s got fudge, hints of almond, caramel, and even marshmallow cream – sounds like a best-seller.
Cinnamon Sugar Toast
Stick with the classics, right? What kid didn’t love cinnamon sugar toast? And since it’s apparently a thing to put butter in coffee (barf, but whatever floats your boat, guys), it’s likely to go over great. Need more proof? I have a friend who dips her buttered toast in hot chocolate – and calls it “swingy toast,” in case you were wondering. She swears by the off-kilter combo. Add a dose of cinnamon, and coffee lovers will be lined up. Just wait and see.
P.S. To all the actual flavor makers out there, my ideas are absolutely out for sale. There’s plenty more BS where this came from, and yes, I would love to be paid in creamer.