0
The Grossest Foods of Them All
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , ,

I’m not picky. Really. If you cook it, I’ll almost always eat it … or at least try. I’ve never been scared of home cooking and prefer someone’s kitchen adventures to eating out almost every day. Creating my own kitchen adventures are also a good time. In fact, I catch flack for trying too many weird things, or for being willing to try too much. Admittedly, my experiments sometimes are over the top – to the point where they aren’t that worth eating. But I still attempted, right? But I’m not universally a garbage disposal, either. There are still some foods I dislike. Some that I won’t even touch, and am grossed out by a single whiff. Including: Hot Dogs Puke. These things are about as disgusting as they come. As I understand it, it’s basically all the animal leftovers ground up and put into tiny little tubes. Then marketed […]

Read More
0
#LongHairProbs
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , ,

As previously discussed, I have a lot of hair. Not only in length, but width; each strand of my hair has a larger circumference than the average grower’s locks. If the ’80s were to come back in style, I’d rock it hard … with minimal hairspray. And really, I can only hope they do. Big hair is my absolute jam, and in order to make up for the years of fighting my God-given talent (sheer follicle volume), I think it’s high time I cash in. But first off, let’s start by discussing what could obviously be changed. I could cut my hair, sure. I could chop it off and be done with half of what this post complains about. In fact I have, several times. I’ve gone under the scissors and had my hair shortened to chin length and above. Only I still shed as much and my hair is […]

Read More
0
The Midwesterner Goes South
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , , , ,

Note: This post was originally written for a Southern magazine, which (nicely) rejected it for being too controversial. Their new topic request is your gain. The first date my now-husband ever took me on was for coffee, like an IRL cliché. At the counter, standing next to the 5’3″ scrawny girl, he told the barista his caffeine preferences: “I like my coffee how I like my women: strong and stout.” Which is just hot he got it: piping hot and without sweetener. The request was forward, and left me with few comments – which is probably what any man wants out of life: caffeine and a surefire way to keep their lady quiet. Blinded by the Southern drawl and weaponry adorned across his waist (his “belt knife”), I was too smitten to ask if that was the truth. Should I consider a tan? Would my homemade coffee need to be stronger? Those […]

Read More
0
Every Day is Craft Day
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , , ,

It’s true, my hobbies, in my old age, are getting kind of lame. Where I once enforced a two-beer knitting rule, now it’s an it’s-after-10-p.m. rule … or I just stop crafting because my carpal tunnel is acting up. But now the lame-ness factor is only getting worse; I’m starting in on quilts and indoor gardening projects – and I even do it on the weekends. Sometimes with accomplices, other times with Toga as my only witness. I’m getting Facebook notifications for craft-based games. I’m learning that craft-based games exist. My sewing machine has taken claim on the dining room table. And the worst part is, I actually like it. Because it’s cold and because it’s deployment, I need some things to pass the time. And when those things are productive, even better. Why Netflix when you can Netflix and make a blanket to keep you cozy for the next […]

Read More
0
Read This Book With Me, EVERYONE
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , , ,

Confession: I am new at being a military wife … but I am definitely not new at judging books. In fact, I haven’t finished a terrible (or somewhat annoying) book since 11th grade, and that was a book on tape that I listened to by force — when the “force” was not getting a bad grade. Every book I’ve actually finished since, however, has been amazing. That’s also why I’m oh-so-delighted to recommend The Modern Military Spouse, a super awesome book that everyone I’ve ever met should read. Unlike most military wife literature (if that’s not already a genre, it just got coined), it realizes we’re some real down-ass chicks. And we need to read some down-ass books. Like this one that outlines the ups and the downs, the hardships that non-military won’t quite understand, and the simple differences from civilian world that create absolutely massive lifestyle gaps. Who Should Read the Book? Any military […]

Read More
0
My Neighborhood is Probably Haunted
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , ,

Squeak. Creaaaak. Errrrrrrr. Squeak SQUEEAAAAAK. That’s what I hear every time I step outside my front door. It’s also what I hear when the heat shuts off or anytime the house gets too quiet. It’s like the start of a horror story that never gets past its foretelling scenes – where the audience is right on the edge of their seats, only nothing happens. That’s reason number one that my neighborhood is probably haunted. For logic’s sake, we can talk about the source of the squeaking: it’s a windmill down the block that’s likely gaining more rust with all the recent rain/freezing temperatures. In the wind or anytime there’s almost a breeze, it’s telling its weathered ways. But because the structure is tall and the wind is an absolute constant – seriously it’s some type of science-defying wind tunnel; just ask all of my dead garden plants – the high-pitched […]

Read More
0
Favorite Ways to Keep Warm
Posted by Bethaney - Tagged , , ,

It’s chilly, there’s no doubt about it. Paired with my general nature for being freezing in tall seasons, it sometimes means staying warm through creativity. Out of all of the methods there are of staying warm — without being a blanket-hoarding hermit — here are some of my favorites. Flannel Sheets Whoever invented these things must be a millionaire, or at least I hope they are. Versions that come in cheesy prints are just icing on the cake. Tea … and a Mug Warmer This handy little surface might be made for candle wax, but it’s keeping my drinks nice and toasty all the same. Slippers So cozy. So comfy. Oversized Clothes Three sizes bigger and this mannequin will be set for longterm warmth. Soup Warm, tasty, winning.

Read More